Trairi de martie/March feelings

Era o zi mohorata de martie,iar ploaia isi imprastia picaturile precum niste dansatori profesionisti ce isi etaleaza trupurile salbatice cu generozitate. Dans frenetic la inceput de primavara, cu miros de vanilie si mosc…splendida coregrafie si vigoare.

De la fereastra ei se vedeau jocuri de culori reflectate prin umbrelele oamenilor grabiti, elemente ce alcatuiau intregul ce nu era intreg…dar ea vroia sa creada, persista in convingere. Asculta in surdina slow blues rock si se intreaba daca schimbarea trebuie sa vina de la ea sau de la  persoanele ce isi  consuma timpul si energia sa para ce nu sunt. Si DA, se simtea ranita si dezamagita, dar stie ca “aceia” au aparut pe lume dintr-o eroare provocandu-i  greata. Incearca sa-i inteleaga, dar ce sa intelegi atunci cand nu este nimic de inteles?!? Poate ca a venit momentul sa-si de un restart…ei sau ea?!?

O deranjau falsele intentii ce ii invadau spatiul  intim, echilibrul ii fusese zguduit si isi reprosa ca nu a avut grija in cine sa se increada. Caci asa este ea, credula..asa a fost educata sa ofere iubire, sa fie blanda si sa stie sa zambeasca. Reactii uzuale ce vin de la sine, nu depune niciun efort sa fie altfel decat este. Cu toate acestea simte ca undeva, cumva se intampla ceva gresit.

Chipul posomorat i se reflecta in ultimele picaturi din ceaiul care astepta sa-i aduca liniste si poate raspunsuri. Pleoapele greoaie ii cadeau, vroia sa doarma si sa uite macar pentru cateva ceasuri de incertitudine. Stia ca va reusi pentru ca nu era prima data cand nebuloasa o invada.

It was a gloomy day in March, and the rain was scattering its drops like professional dancers displaying their wild bodies generously. Frantic dance at the beginning of spring, with the smell of vanilla and musk… splendid choreography and vigor.

From her window could be seen games of colors reflected through the umbrellas of the hurried people, elements that made up the whole that was not whole, but she wanted to believe, persist in conviction. She listens in silence slow blues rock and wonders if the change must come from her or from people who consume their time and energy to seem what they are not. And YES, she felt hurt and disappointed, but she knows that “they” appeared in the world by mistake, causing her nausea. He tries to understand them, but what to understand when there is nothing to understand?!? Maybe it’s time to restart… them or her?!

She was bothered by the false intentions that invaded her intimate space, her balance had been shaken and she reproached herself for not caring who to trust. Because that’s how she is, gullible … that’s how she was educated to offer love, to be gentle and to know how to smile. Usual reactions that come naturally do not make any effort to be different than they are. However, she feels that somewhere, something wrong is happening.

Her gloomy face is reflected in the last drops of tea waiting to bring her peace and maybe answers. Her heavy eyelids were falling, she wanted to sleep and forget for at least a few hours of uncertainty. She knew she would succeed because it wasn’t the first time the nebula had invaded her.